Many people experience relationship anxiety at some point in their life. And if you’ve already experienced it, you know how difficult it can be to cope with. In this article, we highlight some of the main reasons for relationship anxiety and ways to overcome it.
What Is Relationship Anxiety?
Relationship anxiety involves emotions such as doubt, insecurity, worry, and stress regarding yourself or your partner. You may feel stuck or fear your partner will leave you (despite having no reason to do so). It can be mentally taxing. Relationship anxiety can happen to anyone, no matter how happy your relationship is or how long you’ve been together.
Causes of Relationship Anxiety
Here are just a few common reasons a person may experience relationship anxiety.
An Anxious Attachment
If you had a relationship with your parents or caregivers growing up that was sometimes loving and caring but also sometimes cruel, maybe even neglectful, you may need constant assurance in your romantic relationship. People with anxious attachments tend to look for signs that people they love and trust are losing interest.
All My Exes
If you had a rocky relationship in the past where you felt your value, attractiveness, loyalty, etc., were constantly questioned, it can trigger anxiety in a new relationship that the same thing will happen.
Low Self-Esteem
If you suffer from low self-esteem or question your self-worth, you may also question the authenticity of your partners actions.
Failure to Communicate
Sometimes, relationship anxiety is caused by failing to talk about your relationship, feelings, and plans for the future! Or, you are simply more interested in talking about your future together than your partner – which can cause more feelings of unease!
How to Kick Relationship Anxiety
Overcoming relationship anxiety takes patience, care, and communication. Here are a few ways you can nip it in the bud.
Talk It Out
Be open and honest with your partner about how you feel, and allow them to be open and honest with you, too, without getting angry or putting their feelings down.
Journal
Relationship anxiety can arise out of nowhere, and you may even experience negative thoughts that don’t reflect how you really feel. Instead of letting those thoughts drag you down, get them out of your head by writing them down. This allows you to work through your feelings and leave those intrusive thoughts on the page.
Anxious Thoughts? No, Thank You
Imagine being cozied up with your significant other when, suddenly, your mind starts racing with anxious thoughts. While it may not always feel like it, you have options at this point. You can let your thoughts consume you – or enjoy the moment.
Distractions, Distractions
If you start to feel anxiety coming on, take this opportunity to focus on something else. It’s okay to distract yourself by reading a book or catching up on your favorite show. Go for a walk, or set a timer to start organizing your room! Before you know it, you’ll be thinking about something else!
Seek Therapy
You don’t have to battle relationship anxiety on your own. Sometimes, you need a third party to listen and work through your feelings.