Of all the relationships – romantic, platonic, familial, the relationship with yourself is arguably the most important relationship you’ll ever be in. Think about it – you’re with yourself every step of the way from the beginning to the end, so the bond should be solid, to say the least. Here are a few ways to build a stronger relationship with yourself.
Just Checking In
Take the time to check in with yourself and see how you really feel at any given time. As you take the time to consider your feelings, practice validating them and accepting your feelings without judgment. When you do this, you’ll be able to understand not ust your feelings but also why you’re feeling the way you are and address your core needs.
Basic Self-Care Needs
We’re talking about sleep, nutrition, moving your body, rest, and sunshine. Sure, this kind of self-care doesn’t include a big iced coffee or a long bubble bath, but these things are the basic foundations of real self-care.
Take Yourself on Dates
Let’s have some fun. Treat yourself right and go out on the ultimate solo date. Get dressed up, go out to dinner at your favorite restaurant, take your leftovers home for a midnight snack, and order dessert while you’re there or to go. You deserve to treat yourself.
Learn to Say No
It’s okay to say no and it’s okay to choose different options that work for you. Maybe it’s been a long week at work and you need a relaxing Friday evening by yourself, but your friends are begging you to go out. Take a minute to consider your feelings, you energy level, and how interested you are in the plans, THEN decide if going out is really for you. It’s okay if you need time to rest and it’s okay if going out and being around your friends is more what you need. Again, just take the time to check in with yourself.
Kind Words Only
At one point or another, a lot of us have experienced a moment when we could have been a little kinder to ourselves. You know what they say, there’s no time like the present, so start speaking kindly to yourself, be kind, be gentle, and try again. Despite what most of us have been told, having conversations with ourselves can be extremely helpful when it comes to working through these moments.
Talk to a Therapist
If you’re struggling with your relationship with, well, you, seek professional help in the form of therapy. A therapist will work with you to target the areas where you’re stuck and help you work through them. Therapy is also a great option if you struggle with speaking to yourself with kindness and compassion.
No, It’s Not Selfish
Taking care of yourself is not a bad thing nor is it a selfish thing. Not everything you do for yourself is a luxury or treat, in fact, a lof of the things we do are necessary like checking in on how you feel, setting boundaries, saying no, and going to therapy when you feel like you need to.